Tag: life

Friendships

They are choosing you.

We are all guilty of neglecting friendships; not reaching out when we should, not making time for that coffee date, calling just to check on them…………………. you get the point! Fact is we get so caught up in our own roller coaster ride of life that we forget the value of those friendships sometimes.

I had an impromptu day date with a very dear friend the other day. Our time together was no different than any of the other we have. From the minute we see each other neither can stop talking. We have to catch each other up on what’s going on. Every date includes; eating, shopping and Starbucks!

I always leave feeling so much better and wondering why we both waited so long between each time. She is one of those friends that is always there no matter what, she always send the perfect message at the perfect time, loves me for who I am, and reaches out when she needs me for ANYTHING!

That night after a wonderful day with her, I text her as I normally do to thank her for the wonderful time I had, it was much needed and we need more of them. It made me think- what an honor it is for someone to choose me. If they text me, they are choosing to have a conversation with me. If they invite me to do something, they are choosing to spend time with me. Friends are people who choose you! They are not like my sister who does not have an option (lol).

Friends are those who lift you up, who are there to wipe the tears, laugh with, you can trust them, encourage you, they also bring out the best version of you. Friendships should not be hard! They should not drain your energy, show jealousy, criticize you, make you feel bad about who you are, do not respect your boundaries, are only there when they need you!

We all must learn to appreciate those relationships. It should be an honor to have them. I am the first to admit to not being the best friend. This is truly a weakness of mine that needs work. Today I challenge you to think about your relationship with your friends, what can you do to strengthen those relationships and show appreciation .

“Because of you, I laugh a little harder, cry a little less, and smile a lot more.“

you go first!

How to Make Yourself Happy: Choosing to Put Yourself First

For a long time, I thought that happiness was something I had to earn—something that came after checking off a long list of responsibilities, making sure everyone else was okay, and leaving myself for last. Sound familiar? If you’re a natural giver, caretaker, or just someone who’s used to putting others first, this might resonate with you.

But here’s the truth I had to learn the hard way: You can’t pour from an empty cup. If you keep showing up for everyone but yourself, eventually, you’ll burn out—and the happiness you’re chasing will feel further away than ever.

So how do you make yourself happy? It starts with one powerful decision: putting yourself first.

1. Recognize That You Deserve to Be a Priority

This isn’t about being selfish. It’s about self-respect. You deserve rest. You deserve joy. You deserve time to do the things that light you up. If you keep waiting for permission, you’ll never get it. Give it to yourself.

Ask: What would my life look like if I treated my needs as valid?

2. Learn to Say No (Without Guilt)

Saying no is one of the kindest things you can do—for yourself and for others. It means you’re honoring your energy and your limits. The guilt will come at first, but over time, you’ll realize how freeing it is to stop overextending yourself.

Start small. Say no to something minor today. Let it be uncomfortable. Then remind yourself: I am allowed to protect my peace.

3. Make Time for What Fills You Up

Happiness often lives in the small things: a slow morning, a walk in the sun, laughing with a friend, creating something just for fun. The trick is making time for these things, not just hoping they’ll happen.

Try scheduling “joy time” the way you would any other appointment. Put it on your calendar—and keep that promise to yourself.

4. Speak to Yourself Like Someone You Love

We are often our own harshest critics. But what if, instead, you became your biggest cheerleader? Practice speaking to yourself with kindness, encouragement, and patience. You don’t need to be perfect. You just need to be present.

Affirm to yourself: I am worthy of love and happiness, just as I am.

5. Surround Yourself with What (and Who) Feels Good

Protect your space. That includes the people you allow in it. Notice how you feel after spending time with someone—do you feel lighter or drained? Energy doesn’t lie. Surround yourself with people who support your growth and reflect the love you’re learning to give yourself.

Decluttering your environment (physically and emotionally) creates space for peace and happiness to settle in.

Final Thoughts: You’re Not Selfish—You’re Self-Aware

Choosing to put yourself first is not a betrayal of others; it’s a commitment to your own well-being. And the beautiful part? When you are full—of joy, energy, peace—you have so much more to give. But this time, it’s not from a place of obligation. It’s from overflow.

So go ahead. Take up space. Say yes to yourself. Make happiness a habit—not a destination.

You deserve to be happy, not just helpful.

Be You!

From a young age, we are influenced by the expectations of family, teachers, peers, and society. We are gently (or not so gently) taught how to behave, what to believe, and even who we should become. While some of this guidance helps us navigate the world, it can also push us away from our true selves.

Many of us, at some point, have put on a mask—whether to fit in, avoid criticism, or meet someone else’s standards. But living for external validation comes at a cost. It can create anxiety, dissatisfaction, and even a sense of emptiness. True fulfillment comes when we step into our own identity, unapologetically embracing who we are.

What holds us back from being ourselves?

Fear of Rejection or Judgment

One of the biggest reasons people hide their true selves is the fear of not being accepted. Whether it’s the opinions of family, friends, colleagues, or even strangers on social media, we often worry about what others think.

Who are you?

Recently I was asked this question. At first I began to think about my titles. But that wasn’t what they were asking for. Stop and think for a minute and ask yourself; What are my values and beliefs, interest and passions, personality, relationships, purpose and meaning, and sense of self ( self-image)? Honestly this was a hard task! I had a longer list of what I was not than what i was. Also, I kept thinking of what I use to be. Why was that? My problem was like many of you, I was and had become afraid to be myself. You nor I should never apologize for who we are! We fear people will not like us, respect us, or value us if we do not “fit in”. While i was pondering on this, all i could think about was the many times I have reminded my daughter to be herself! God placed each of us on this earth with special qualities. He did not want us to all be the same. We should not envy others, compare ourselves, or conform to what others want us to be. But the reality is, not everyone will like or understand us—and that’s okay. The people who matter will accept us as we are.

Stop trying to fit in!

Being yourself isn’t always easy, but it is one of the most powerful acts of self-love and courage.

Romans 12:2 “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

Remember “Be yourself, everyone else is taken”

Life in the Fast Lane….

Do you ever think about your life? Like seriously think about it? I use to be the girl that on Monday was wishing it was already Friday! I still do sometimes, I was always rushing around, trying to see how much I could cram into a day (okay so maybe I still do) BUT even though I may still be and do all those things- something changed!! It was so bad, I could not even sit down to watch a movie because I felt like I was wasting time. Every minute of every day needed to be consumed in doing something productive.

So many of us are trying to make sure that our children have it better than we did by allowing them to participate in sports, cheer, dance, and signing them up for summer camps. Taking them on all these adventures. While I am not saying this is a bad thing, I do think we are overwhelming them sometimes just as much as we are ourselves. They too need down time. Time to be children just like we need time to be an adult.

As a mother, I remember when Taylor graduated from High School and how i felt- completely lost. I had everything scheduled out- and I mean everything!! From what days we had practice, game days- if they were home or away and depending on the day of the week I knew exactly which restaurant I was ordering our dinner or if we could eat at home. My phone contacts were full of restaurants numbers and I knew the specials depending on the day. While she was in whichever activity practicing I would not sit and wait like some of the other moms. I was either in my car grading assignments, preparing for lecture the next day or you would find me in the grocery store or Walmart. I was literally trying to multitask all the time!!

Today, I still struggle with some of the same things, how can I get one more task done in this 30 min. before I have to be somewhere else? Sitting in a zoom meeting, I am thinking about what I need to do when I get off, or maybe checking my emails while the meeting is going on. Come on, we all know we do this. Instead, I have began to just focus on the meeting, how can I engage more, contribute more. EMBRACE what is in front of you! Not only what you can get out of it but also, what you can contribute.

Instead of focusing on the next moment or the next thing I needed to do- I now try to EMBRACE each moment! Enjoy the week! I look back on my life and realize I was not enjoying the moments that God had given me and boy did I miss out! So as the weekend is coming to an end, I challenge you to slow down and enjoy each moment no matter what you are doing! EMBRACE the time with the ones around you, soak up all that is happening, engage with those around you!! Love life to its fullest and not wishing it away! Monday can be just as amazing as a Friday- mindset and perspective.

Until next time remember, “Life is short. Time is fast. No replay, No rewind. So enjoy every moment as it comes.“